Women and Their Fathers
So, what are fathers for? What is their unique value to girls? I believe a father can provide any or all of the following to his daughter:
One man’s opinion – a viewpoint and way of being, a source of emotional and intellectual and tutelary richness that is different from Mom’s.
One man’s history – continuity from his past to her future, knowledge from his experience, his victories and failures.
One man’s chemistry – his genes mingling with hers; his face and features, inflections and temperament, moods and instincts, all contributing to the alchemy of her personality.
One man’s empathy – a haven from mother, a court of appeal, a source of perspective
One man’s body – his beard and scent, his frame and strength, his touch and sheltering arms, giving her the first, wondrous feel of a loving man’s physical intimacy.
One man’s charmed attention – a chance to rehearse, in a way that she cannot with her mother, what love with a man can be like.
One man’s validation – a chance to voice and test her opinions, which he will not perceive as betrayals.
One man’s adaptability – the capacity to weather with equanimity the seasons of his own life as well as hers.
One man’s willingness to learn – from the triumphs and tragedies of her life, as well as his own.



